venting is good for the mind

I know I shouldn't be writing tonight because I have had all my buttons pushed tonight by all the boys/men in my house this week, therefore, this post may have a bit of a slant to the negative...
Mason, what are we going to do with this kid! He has always been my difficult one. You would think by age 5 i would have him figured out, but just the opposite. I just don't know what to do with him. It's like he doesn't hear our voice at all. You tell him to do something and he does the complete opposite. A few weeks ago he had done something that made me upset. I got at his level and spoke to him in a very stern voice while holding his arm and the first break in my sentence he butted in and asked if I thought the birds would come out today. OMG what am i to do. This week has been especially bad. He has landed on red 4 days in a row at school. In the entire school year he has only been on red once. and now he has been there 4 days in a row. He got punishments and talking to's the first day and everyday since. Last night he even had a playdate and a hockey game taken away. I thought for sure that would put him into shape, but no, red again. so tonight i took away a concert this weekend and he had to go to bed after dinner while Jack stayed up to watch a movie. This seemed to actually affect him. maybe he needs to feel the pain right then and there. maybe if i took him to the concert or the hockey game and then made him leave then he would understand how much his punishment sucks. I just don't know what to do. I worry so much about him. I'm concerned about what he will be like as a teenager. he just never seems to listen, he is in his own little world and he will do what he wants to do.
At least they take turns. Jack has really had a pretty good week. He has found a new founds love for the barney song I love You. He wants me to sing it over and over to him and cradle him like a baby while i do it. I guess I've found a new found love for that song as well. The days of cradling him, making eye contact and singing him are fewer then I would like and are most likely going to be fading away fast. I just wish i could hold onto these moments forever.
We have a big weekend. We are take down one of the walls in our bedroom to add some much needed light with some windows. I hope it won't put us in the pit. We've only gotten a rough estimate of the cost, so I'm a bit nervous.
Well hopefully we will have a good weekend so that we can start off the week right and put last week behind us.

Sweet Jack

There was once a time I couldn't imagine Jack being anything but perfect. Perfectly mannered, perfectly happy, perfectly sweet. Then he hit the tender age of two and my sweet little Jack started pushing buttons, biting and hitting his brother, screaming and throwing tantrums every time he didn't get his way. But because God is good, sweet Jack makes an appearance at least a few times every day, especially in the morning. And I just know I will get my sweet Jack back for good some day. Most recently we were getting ready for school and he came up and started hugging my leg at which point I picked him up and gave him a hug. He pulled back and looked at me at said "I love you sooo much, you are such a good girl" gave me a kiss and another big hug. Almost made me cry. Thank you God for these moments.

hmmmm

Having another baby is always a subject in our house. We joke with the kids about trying to convince Kev to have another and me to not. However, we haven't said anything about it in sometime, as we were going to try to leave it up to God after our fast. But you never no what is going to come out of the mouths of babes.
As kev and i were sitting on the couch at the end of the day out of no where Mason asked us "when are you going to be pregnant again?" OMG not expecting that! totally took me of guard, it was so bold and to the point. All I could think to say is "Ask daddy"

Oh Jack

Jack in the back complaining about his foot.

Jack "my foot is itchy"
Me "I'm sorry is it bugging you?"
Jack begins inspecting his foot closely and is quiet for sometime.

Jack "momma i don't see any bugs can you get them out"

when we grow up

Today I asked the boys when they grew up. Mason's eyes got big and excited and he announced he wanted to be a paleontologist. Next I asked Jack to which he said "big"! that kid is so funny!

Taxes and Birthdays

Ahhh feels good to be home, but bitter sweet to leave. We spent the weekend at mom and dads to do taxes on turbo tax and to celebrate moms 62nd birthday. its an annual tradition to go there to do those two things. The kids had a blast. They love going there and playing in the big backyard. Jack asked all day on Friday when we were going so he could go ride papa's tractor, also known as the lawn mower. We got there late on Friday, so first thing when Jack woke up Saturday, he started asking about the tractor. He was very patent and his dream finally came a reality. Per my dad, he put Jack in the trailer of the lawnmower and thought he was having a great time until he looked back an he had a look of fear on his face. apparently not have such a great time. that day was also included Jack getting locked outside alone to which completely scared him and him falling hard onto his backside. Not the greatest start, but the thing about Jack is that he gets over stuff pretty fast. By afternoon he was back on cloud nine. mason had a great time too. he spent his time "playing" the piano and running outside. He also went over to the neighbors and played with two little girls who showed him around the farm and helped him learn to climb a tree. He is still talking about it. I asked the kids what their favorite part of the weekend was. for jack it was going to the farm, which i assume is the neighbors house and Mason was playing with the two girls. Mason has always been really good at playing with both boys and girls. he can rev it up for the boys and settle down for the girls. a really good trait that will come in handy as he grows. I don't think jack will have the same ability. he's just too energetic for the girls.
I made a calendar with all of the Faith/Fuller family pictures for my mom, which she really seemed to like. My dad had a great idea to get a web cam for their house and our house and to set Chad up as well so that we could talk and see each other. i think it will be great to have. the kids love it and thinks it's pretty cool.
So another great weekend, it always makes me wish we all lived closer. maybe some day we will...

wow it's been a while

I think i may have completely forgotten about my blog. looking back at the last few months, i think this year is off to a good start. Jack officially potty trained January 23rd. He was bribed with a big kid bed. We went to the store and bought a cars bed set and told him if he made it through the whole week without and accident he would get his big kid bed. well it took 2 weeks but at last the dream came to pass. He was so excited, and still continues to be. every time we have someone over, he runs to his room to show off his bed. However, my greatest fear also came to pass. i was worried that once his crib was down he would never stay in bed....which is what happened. he was threatened that if he kept getting up, the bed would go away. things have gotten better, but naps are a thing of the past. oh so very sad. what 2 year old doesn't take a nap. he is still forced to have quiet time, because lets face it, mommy needs him to have quiet time. otherwise things are good with him. we are having a good week. he is listening well(ish) and following directions. I was due this week because he has progressively gotten more difficult as he has gotten older. he is always always testing. he gets frustrated with not getting his way easy and is much more physical them mason ever was. he hits and kicks mason constantly. I try to stay out of the countless arguments between them, but it's hard not to when one is beating up the other.
Mason is doing very well. He has been listening well and following directions. He is excited about school. He read me an entire book for he first time a few days ago. It was a book on creation. he did such a great job. he is always so worried that he cant do stuff. I had to bribe him to read it to me and i would post on facebook that he read an entire book. He was so thrilled to see all the posts that followed. the things he has been saying lately have been cracking me up. he told me the other day that dinosaurs and caveman were alive in 1983. when i told him that i was 4 years old then and didn't remember seeing them, he just said, "oh". He is getting very smart. I don't think i give him enough credit. The things he comes up with sometimes just shock me. He has been very concerned about the people of Hatti. He donated all the money in his piggy bank to the relief efforts. It is one of my greatest hopes that my children will always think of others in need and give without hesitation to others. Now that mason is getting older, i can see these teachings paying off a little. it makes me so very happy. What we need to do now is to start giving him chores and an allowance. We will be looking into that this next week.
Kev and I spent the last week of Jan fasting. Kev fasted from tv, I fasted from the Internet. we were praying about jobs and having one more child. nothing has come of it yet.... someone in bible study this week gave me a great piece of advice. she told me to be thankful for what i have. seems so simple, but for some reason i see it in a totally different light. I spend so much time trying to figure out my next step, i never stop and am just thankful. so that is what i am going to do. I am so looking forward to this summer and the camping trips we have planned. time with family is something we desperately need.